Yesterday, when we were at the fast food place, we purchased some lunch for Kerri to bring home. The cashier took our order, and then asked me if my daughter was biological or adopted. I have not really had anyone ask me since we left the States, so I was caught by surprise. I answered only "my daughter is adopted", and put a protective hand on Kerri's shoulder. And then the cashier went on to say: "Oh, I figured as much because she certainly doesn't look biological, I mean she does not look mixed." I was speechless, and did not reply. Instead, I began a conversation with Kerri about her meal.
In the past, I would usually respond with sarcasm or a funny comment that would also put a person in their place. But this time, I did not know what to say. Kerri did not seem to mind, and she did not say anything either. I am not sure what to make of it, except that it breaks my heart that Kerri has to hear things like this and is constantly reminded that she is adopted, that she does not look like us. On the other hand, we have been very open with her and she seems to readily accept that this is our normal, and that it is OK. But it is so not fair.
Life with Kerri makes me want to protect her.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
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5 comments:
Why are people so nosey. Sometimes I would love to my comeback to be something so inappropriate that they would never ever dare to ask a question such as that again. What business is it of theirs anyway?
I really am taking out that bank loan. LOL
Leave our children alone PLEASE
UGH!
okay just so anyone who doesn't want to hear a mean, nasty comeback now is the time to scroll down past this.
Okie dokie - my answer would have been (and with a really menacing yet syrupy smile on my face ala Jack Nicholson in "The Shining"), "Why my goodness dear I bet your parents were surprised with you too!" She WILL ask why and my answer would have been, "because they weren't expecting a mentally challenged child such as yourself".
Stupid people.
Honestly - ya think? I mean - duh! How brilliant to state the obvious? So why do people feel compelled to say what ever pops into their TV addled brains without filtering it first? I just don't get it. I do joke that I don't have an 'internal dialogue' anymore but yeah, I do. It's called TACT - apparently she didn't get that memo. I just ate about a yard of some girl's butt at a restaurant today when she skipped me in line (waiting on people) to wait on her friends behind me. I asked her if she was racist - she was stunned. When she said no and of course asked the big WHY thus opening the door I answered, "Oh I just thought you weren't waiting on middled aged blonde white women with big boobs today. I can see why you would be racist". Then I looked down at her sad little flat chest fixing my gaze there for more than a comfortable moment. She got my order very quickly which I gave to her in the manner previously stated. Then I talked to her manager. Am I mean? You betcha. Had that happened while I was with you all, it would not have ended well and you would have been given the opportunity to walk away with Kerri while Tia made this idiot cry. Ugh. Sorry dear, wish I had been there. I promise you had I been there - when she got out of the fetal position and through sobbing uncontrolably in the back room she'd never do it again.
All I can say is "I see stupid people." Everyday. What the F is wrong with people?
Honestly, I have NEVER felt the need to ask ANYONE if their kid was adopted! Even BEFORE I was friends with such dear adoptive families. That's absurd that people ask such questions. Next time you should ask them how much they weigh? Or how much money they make? Or if their father is their REAL father? WTF! This just pisses me off. Why does it matter to anyone other than you, Corey and Kerri whether or not she's bio or adopted? And honestly, WHO CARES???? YOU are her mother. PERIOD. Who cares how it happened? GRRRRRR
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