The pushy bird gets the worm.

Two years ago, I enrolled Kerri in a free program so she could obtain speech therapy. However, there was a long waiting list, so we chose to go privately instead. That is, until my husband lost his job in February.

Then during the summer, Kerri was finally evaluated and placed on a priority list for speech therapy through the school board when she started Kindergarten. And finally, a few days ago I got tired of waiting and decided to get pushy. The squeaky wheel thing, you know?

Last night I got a phone call from the person in charge of the program at Kerri's school. And she began to tell me that it could be three quarters of a year before Kerri even starts. Not acceptable! So the pushy, squeaky wheel turned into the pleading, please-feel-sorry-for-me wheel. Because you get more bees with honey, right? And I was told that Kerri would be placed in front of the other three children as a priority, due to the severity of her phonological delay. Which means sometime in the next 8 weeks Kerri will start speech therapy at school (we hope). And they will evaluate her for OT (Occupational Therapy) and possibly Physiotherapy as well.

So my lesson for today is: money gets you what you want. But if you can't afford it, the pushy bird and the squeaky wheel get you noticed. And the sweetness and sob story get you to the front of the line.

Life with Kerri keeps me chirping. And this bird is no longer singing the blues!

Excuse me?!

Yesterday, when we were at the fast food place, we purchased some lunch for Kerri to bring home. The cashier took our order, and then asked me if my daughter was biological or adopted. I have not really had anyone ask me since we left the States, so I was caught by surprise. I answered only "my daughter is adopted", and put a protective hand on Kerri's shoulder. And then the cashier went on to say: "Oh, I figured as much because she certainly doesn't look biological, I mean she does not look mixed." I was speechless, and did not reply. Instead, I began a conversation with Kerri about her meal.

In the past, I would usually respond with sarcasm or a funny comment that would also put a person in their place. But this time, I did not know what to say. Kerri did not seem to mind, and she did not say anything either. I am not sure what to make of it, except that it breaks my heart that Kerri has to hear things like this and is constantly reminded that she is adopted, that she does not look like us. On the other hand, we have been very open with her and she seems to readily accept that this is our normal, and that it is OK. But it is so not fair.

Life with Kerri makes me want to protect her.

If only...

Today after school, I took Kerri to her favorite fast food place (she calls it "Old McDonalds"), for some fun in the large play structure. And Kerri quickly made friends with a little girl. The mom and I made small talk, and when it was time to go, Kerri invited her new friend to our home for a play date. She even told her what street we live on! I did not even know Kerri knew our address.

The little girl's mom quickly pointed out that they lived across town. But the little girl decided that would not stop her and told her mom that we could always meet back at this play structure.

The mom and I laughed, and she said: "if only adults made friends as easily as little children do.".

And as we said our goodbyes, I kept thinking about her comment. If only adults were more like children in so many other ways!

Life with Kerri teaches me a lesson, every day.

A scary nosebleed.

We were finishing dinner when Kerri decided to blow her nose, hard. And then all of a sudden she started to bleed heavily, from her nose. It took several tissues and ten minutes of pinching her nostrils before it stopped. It was pretty scary to watch, although Kerri did not feel anything. And it was even scarier to act like nothing wrong was happening, so we would not alarm Kerri.

So after dinner, I suggested that we watch a movie in my bedroom, so I could keep an eye on Kerri. As my daughter ate popcorn and watched "Strawberry Shortcake", I read a book while glancing over every few minutes to make sure she was OK. And then Kerri started to choke. I sat her up immediately and blood started coming out heavily from her nose again. I yelled for hubby to come running with more tissues, and the fun started all over again, for 15 more minutes.

Hubby put a humidifier in Kerri's room, and I got absolutely no sleep. I checked on Kerri constantly, afraid the bleeding would start up again and she would choke in her sleep. Kerri was fine, the humidifier seemed to do the trick. I guess with the furnace running more at night, the house gets too dry and this irritated her nose. And when she blew her nose it caused something to bleed.

We have never dealt with nosebleeds before, so we felt helpless and scared. And I guess the mama bear in me came out that night, trying to protect my baby from scary things I did not understand nor could prevent. Thank goodness Kerri has not had any more nosebleeds this weekend.

Life with Kerri keeps me watchful.

Miss you Mom!

It's been a month. I miss my Mom every single day.

Life with Kerri reminds me to make every moment count.

Catching up!

• I am back from the blogging hiatus, and am going to try and catch up! Unfortunately, our laptop met it's demise, so I am unable to post pictures for awhile.
• Florida was hot and humid! It was 85 degrees almost every day while I was there. A big change from the 40 degree weather back home.
• It was great to see my family again. I was surprised to find that either I have shrunk in just a month or my nieces and nephews are growing way too fast! The 13 year old girls are either as tall, or taller than me.
• My luggage was broken into on the flight(s) home. It was not TSA, since the TSA lock was not broken/opened and there was no note. But the zippers were busted and bent, the handles undone and the bag arrived half open and missing quite a bit of clothing. The contents also were in a different order, as if someone went through them. Thank goodness at the last minute I put all the gifts and important items in my purse and carry on bag!
• By the looks of my home, it seems the girls had quite the time! The basement playroom is a mess, and Kerri's room looked like a tornado went through it. But everyone seemed healthy and happy, and glad to see me, which is always way more important than what my house looks like!
• While I was away, Nana made the most awesome pumpkin! I posted a picture on my Facebook profile. For Halloween, Kerri dressed up as Harry Potter, scar and all, and had a blast trick or treating in the neighborhood.
• My back is still bothering me, and the nerve damage is still there. I start physio twice a week, and am hoping to see an improvement soon. In the meantime, the pain is bearable, and I have gotten used to not feeling my left side.
• Kerri went to the dentist to have a cavity filled. She was very upset to find out that her filling was the same color as her tooth. In her words: "White is boring! I should have color choices, like yellow, or pink or blue!". The dentist loves her, she is so good and never needs any kind of numbing. It helps that the dentist is awesome and gentle too.
• Pookie has been groomed for winter, and he looks like he needs a sweater now. He is adorable, except for when I find him on the table finishing Kerri's cereal.
• It's almost a month since my Mom died, and I miss her every day.
• I am trying to convince my Dad to come visit us. I would fly him up here, and have him see our great dentist while he is here too.
• The Wii was a success! Kerri is really good at the Scooby Doo game, and hubby likes to belt out Beatles tunes with his Rock Band game. Even Nana tried playing guitar, and she is quite good at it too!
• It snowed today! It is not cold enough for it to stick, so it turns to rain. I need to put the snow tires on the Mama mobile soon. Time to get out all our winter gear!

As wonderful as it was to see my Dad and family, I am so happy to be back home.

Life with Kerri resumes!

From Live Oak, finally.

Due to bad weather and delays at the Newark, N.J. airport, I never made my Saturday flight out. Instead, my original airline arranged for me to fly a different airline and itinerary the following morning. And when I called for seat assignments, I had the most unbelievable conversation with the airline rep. Not only did he tell me NOT to tell the airline of my special needs/back injury, he threatened that the airline could deny me boarding because they had not been given 48 hours to review my doctor's note. And then he also suggested I should request an emergency exit seat in order to be more comfortable, despite my reminder that I was injured (he told me not to mention it)! And then he proceeded to ask me if I had been taken off the original flight because I was too big. I so hope they taped that call, because when I get back home I will be writing a letter!

Sunday at 4 AM I gave it a second try, and this time made it to Orlando. My dear friend Tia showed up soon afterwards to pick me up, and we headed to Downtown Disney. We had a wonderful lunch there, and picked up some goodies for hubby and Kerri. And then we went to get Sadie, Tia's beautiful red headed doberman. Sadie, Tia, and I had a great trip North to my Dad's house, where I was so busy talking that I passed the rural street we were supposed to turn on. It did not help that it was pitch dark and that someone had cut down all the trees, which were my landmark. After quick hugs, Tia headed home and I came back to the house I have been to so many times before, but for the first time, without my Mom waiting for me.

The next morning came the hard part, starting my duties as Mom's personal representative. Dad seems to be doing OK, but it just seems so weird to be here without Mom. I keep looking for her, or waiting for her to call out to me.

Kerri seems to be handling the separation well. She is busy playing with the new Wii I bought as a surprise right before I left. Daddy and Nana have taken her out to eat her favorite french fries, and even gifted her with a new Disney movie. And when I call to tuck her in at night, she tells me that she loves me "from the South Pole all the way to Canada and back". How can I make my beautiful daughter understand that the universe is not big enough to describe our love for her?

Life with Kerri is just not the same without her nearby.